Friday, October 8, 2010

Why, Why, Why?

I am so sore. Just from walking. It is just making my knees hurt. Everyday, I want to talk myself out of walking. But so far, I've walked. I have a terrible cold, but I still walked. AND, I'll get half way through my walk and have to MAKE myself walk the last half instead of turning and going home. But, I'm still losing. I am at 223.2 I have lost almost every week. Now, my eating comes and goes. In the last two days I have had probably 7 rice krispy treats. I just can't stop myself. They just can't be around. Yesterday was hard, I worked at Schofield library from 10:30-12:30 and came home starving. There was no lettuce for salad, so I made myself a PBJ sandwich. NOT a good choice. 130 calories in the bread and 190 calories in 2 TBS pb. But I ate it and two rice krispy treats anyway. Then Tanner and I went to the girls HS volleyball game and then ran to the church to watch Taz play dodgeball and left a little early (but still about 6:30) and stopped at Mc Donalds. I got a hot fudge sundae and a double cheese burger. Tanner and Cynj got a 50 piece nugget and I had 5 nuggets and a RK treat!! AGGGG. Why, why, why??? I don't understand how skinny people do it. It is just such a struggle for me. But, I should look on the bright side, most days I'm good. And I determined to conquer this weight thing. I just want to see under 200!!

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